B-TEAM REPORT

DREAM TEAM STAR MAN - THE HOSINATOR!

Hi to all you potty followers

Another week and another opportunity as we entertained the Marquis B hoping to get a few more points on the board. We didn’t play at all well the previous week and were hoping for a serious improvement.

With Glynn and Goochy on first we got off to a good solid start as they won without ever being in trouble but we were soon pegged back as Shoot-em-up and Yid went down to a quick finish. A good tidy game from Bungle and Me, with a 140 from Bill and a considerably quicker finish than last week took us back ahead before Hos and Oz were unlucky to lose the last pairs to leave us all square.

Into the singles and a storming start saw a win for Glynn (eventually) followed by the highlight of the night with Hos hitting a superb 133 finish to get us 2 games ahead. Ozzie was our third player and he seemed to grow in confidence as the game went on (probably because his opponent took 5 throws to score 100 at one point). That said his confidence was so high it was bordering on cockiness as he took 63 out with a 13 bull! A tidy game and a slow finish from Moysie secured us the point before this years in form player Bungle suffered a rare defeat to a 78 finish.

Two games left to find a win and yours truly found a pretty steady game before easing off the gas completely under 150. fortunately I had done enough by then to get the win. The legend that is Goochy tidied up the last game to give us a solid 8-4 win and a much better overall performance than the previous week.

We are managing to rack up a few points and hoping for a good performance this week when we visit the Queens Head for what should be a good close match

See you all soon

Quiff

B-TEAM REPORT

Hi guys

Sorry its been a bit quiet for a couple of weeks but unfortunately I missed the battling home win against the Kevill Arms and this was followed by a trouncing away at the home guard. Some positives to take from the latter was generally quite good play and the marvellous “that’s the best weve played all season” comment from their captain. Thanks Andy!

Anyway, to bring us up to date, last Friday saw us away at the factory arms. An interesting and fun night and I reckon there was only one team in the entire league that could have played worse than us, and that was the factory!

A slow start saw Oz and Hos win and Shoot em up and the Midnight Cowboy lose. Then the fun really started with Bungle and Me. Absolutely awful! You could have turned the board upside down, back to front or put it in another room and I would still have hit at least two fives out of every three darts. The others weren’t much better and the game headed unerringly towards its only conclusion – a double one marathon. After several goes each, time being called, Wally growing a beard and everyone lamenting the rules that do not permit bringing a female sub on to hit for you I eventually managed to bag it! 2-1 up and it felt like we had been playing for hours! I hope they never bring best of three in or our games will all be weekends away. Gooch and Glyn (starting to feel he needs a nickname) then lost against probably their best pair to leave it all square.

In to the singles and win for Goochy followed by yet more fives from yours truly, poor finishing from my opponent and a quick nick and we were two ahead. Hang on, ive got two wins on the board so whats all the fuss about. I guess its true what they say, form is temporary, class is permanent and crap seems to go on forever! Glyn then lost to a good finish and Dave also went down – back to level at 4-4. Paul survived a slow (understatement) start to win and Bungle then struggled to get down the board until he seemed to be suddenly toughed by God or something and hit 132 followed by a 62 finish to win from nowhere. Hos went on next and got us the win, which was a good job as Ozzie on last bottled it with three scores of 26 once he got under 200.
Still a good win away and more points on the board. If we can win playing like that anything can happen if we start playing well

More news to follow - watch this space

Quiff

POT BLACK A 6 EX SERVICEMAN'S HG 6 (Linx jellied it)

A nice picture!! just one of the ones me and Chilly gained after chatting to a couple of young girls at the train station!! Can't show you the others, I didn't notice myself but Chilly really liked her personalit.....ies, the PB does not stand for Peter Baker by the way.

Well onto this week, I wasn't going to do a blog but then decided it was unfair on those people in the team who can actually play darts!!!!!!!!! so guys after last weeks disaster against the mercenaries of Man City- oops sorry I mean the Ole Frank the league's long established big guns met at the Pot Black Club.
To say we were a wee bit better than last week would be an understatement!!!!!

Doubles (did I mention Linx jellied it)

Linx and George lost Linx 125

Peek and Hook won Hooky 180, Peek 140

Skip and Bardy lost Bardy 102st and 140

Spring and Ed won Spring 140

Singles( did i mention Linx jellied it)

Hooky won 180,134,108 17dg

Skip won no high scores!! checked out 80 for a bit of a birthday

Bardy won

Then it went wrong

Spring lost to Champs 16dg Spring 135

George lost to Monsters 19dg

Peek won to get the draw Peek 140

you didn't even bother to try and win! Well I did try, in my defense it was hard to see as I bagged a whole 22 points! Flash 17 dart game!

Linx pooped it on last. Jelly machine!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry about the shortened version but the computer crashed twice, I cant write it all out a 3rd time so the above is courtesy of Skip.

In summary a really good game of darts with all winners for both teams registering really good legs of darts, great performances by Serious and Dirty Peek in both of their games and unfortunate we did not get the win! From 5-2 they played 3 goood games of 16,19 and 17 darts to go 6-5.

It all went down to the last game with Linx on I cant even remember who he played now! but there were glimpses of brown dripping out of the bottom of his jeans as he missed double 10 , AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!! unlucky mate we will get em next time!

Cheers boys up the bar we toddled for a mammoth game of spoof! Briiillliiiaaanntt, out first to round off a cracking night for myself!! Ill try liar dice, nope lost all them too god I had a cracker of a night.

Just about to leave, shall we go out? we were very unsure what to do, a smallish guy by the name of Smasher is straight in, Ill go out! ok lets go, that makes our minds up we will go! Myself , Linx and Slong get out of the car outside Broadview the Chilly drives off. Where Smash? oh he has gone home cheers mate!!!!!!!!!

Gotts Watch

Seems a very popular feature and getting many potential sightings, some are hoaxes as people try to jump on the bandwagon but I know lesser spotted Gotts when I see one and I can whittle out the genuine ones.

1. A man wearing a Ping T-shirt and jeans ripped around the bottom was seen leaving a tanning centre is Gorleston (10 am Monday) I believe this was a true Gotts spot.
2. A short spiky haired man with an orange fake tan face was reported to have booked a chest wax in a local beauty parlour (11 am Tuesday) I believe this to be a genuine Gotts spot.
3. A man was reported to be seen walking a very smelly dog near the garage just opposite the Red House Pub and coming away from Shelley Crossley's florist shop (3.03 pm Wednesday). Must be a Gotts spotting!!!!
4. A black car was seen driving up The Street in Carlton at extreme ( oh that's a funny word!!!) pace!!! not far from the Red House Pub, near Les Whall's house and quite near to Shelley Crossley's florist shop! ( 11pm- He doesn't drink so ill assume he didn't go in the pub, but I have to say a strange time to be buying flowers!!!) Was this the DG?!?!

Joke Corner

Three women were sitting in a bar, (a brunette, red head, and a blonde) they were all pregnant. The brunette says, "I know what I'm going to have." The other two asked how. She replied, "well I was on top when I conceived so I will have a boy". The red head said, "If that is true then I will have a girl because I was on the bottom when I conceived. The blonde starts crying and orders another shot and starts screaming, "PUPPIES, PUPPIES!".

Tip of the week.

If you are having you're wisdom teeth out and they ask you if you want local or general- I would advise general and so would my dentist after he lost his fingers this week!!!!!!!!!

Weekend Sportsman over and out
(By the way did i tell you what happened in Linxs game? he jellied it!!!!!)

POT BLACK A VS OLE FRANK

Well what can I say!!!?? a 9-3 defeat in what has been described by many as our worst performance ever!!! It started badly and never got any better!!
the highlights are below;
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

as you can see there wasn't any.

The first double set the tone for the night as Serious and Dirty came down the board like Phil Taylor and James Wade and ended up on double one as they doubled out like Nicky Lark!!!! Our chins hit the floor and the rest of the night followed in a similar vein! The next two doubles lost as Stinky, Penfold, Skip and Snatural could not turn it around. Up stepped the dynamic duo of Smasher and PH, Ph had the usual we are losing cob on and declared victory was inevitable for him- nope played crap and lost 4-0 down briiiiilllllllllliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiant!!!!

Into the singles and it did improve greatly, Skip was the first to register a victory as did Smasher and someone else who I cant remember ( sorry who ever it was!) generally there is not a lot to say and its fair to say we lost all the close as well as all the games which weren't.

Home guard next week, surely we cant play that bad again?! but who knows!

Anyway, the good news was that Trev Hook put an appearance in and we took on Gary The Mouth Flatt and Ryan the mouth Lincoln in what could on be described as lambs to the slaughter table bowls!! well that's what was being shouted out!! nope Myself and Trev won- apparently I was lucky??!!! who cares...ha ha ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Off to Broadview we toddled, no appearance this week from Penfold and Dirty but the stalwarts put some funds in the till, as usual we had no plans to go there but it ended up going really well!!!!
Jager bomb anyone?! briiiiillllllliiiiiiiiant work was soooooo fun!

GOTT'S WATCH

There has been few potential sightings this week !!
I have had reports that a smallish gent has been seen coming out of Shelley Crossley's florist shop on Wednesday at 1030.
Another person reported seeing a spiky haired man with a limp coming out of Shelley Crossley's florist shop on Thursday at 1601.
In another incident a Black BMW with a disabled badge was spotted parked outside the red house just adjacent to Shelley Crossley's florist shop.

JOKE CORNER

A drunk in a bar pukes all over his own shirt, which was brand new before he came in. “Damn,” he says. “I puked on my shirt again. If the wife finds out, she’s gonna kill me.” “Not to worry,” says the bartender as he sticks a $20 bill in the drunk’s pocket. “Just tell her someone puked on you and gave you some cash to cover the cleaning bill.”So the drunk goes home and tells his wife about the guy who puked on him. She reaches into his pocket and finds two twenties. “Why are there two twenties?” she asks.The drunk replies, “Oh, yeah, he crapped in my pants, too.”.

POT BLACK A VS LTFC

Hi all no blog last week but tough really I'm back on it again this week, last week was a great win in our first tough game of the season it got a bit nip and tuck towards the end but luckily the solid Lark and Harrod combo both won at the end. Law of averages said we were going to get wins in the end. Unfortunately for the natural his win didn't count as we already had 7 so I got one up on him!
this week and another 8-4 victory in a game we made a little tougher than need be.

Doubles

Obviously not sure of the exact details or order but 3-1 up, myself and smasher won, he was at least better than last week but seriously this is a whole new concept for me out scoring my doubles partner, 'Penfold Spring' and Gavin 'dirty' Peek I've shortened it as he stays out now) and think Bardy and Linx were the other winners but that's very vague!

Singles

Well what happened here? got a little bit tight for a while, Dirty Peek made it 6 wins out of 6, Penfold Spring also snuck in. Skip on the beer for his 2nd consecutive week took victory! a good result for someone who officially retired from darts the Friday before! Linx was awful and lost as his scoring wasn't up to its normal scratch of 60,60,60,60,60 unfortunately he was only hitting, 59,57,55,58,59 and he was a bit unlucky with the draw and found himself up against someone who actually aimed for the treble!!! it got to 6-4 and everyone was a little tense I'm not sure why as we had our two bankers on last................. yep you guessed it me and the Snatural Lark, full of mouth as usual and with a bit of swagger after our victories the week before. I was a bit shaky at the start but pulled myself together as I realized my opponent was horrific and played a wee bit better towards the end registering the teams 1st high score of the night!!!!!!!!!! omg wtf!!!!!!!! anyway 7-4 up and the win was secure. The Snatural was up next and in the same situation as the week before in a game of no relevance, The Snatural took victory, and the same as the previous week he was a bit unlucky and it didn't count because we already had 7 and I got another one up on him- its great when you make up the rules of competitions as you always win

The only most wins cup people care about update:

ph 3 wins
fluff 1 win
the natural 1 win

Well with Smasher off to the Ole Frank to prep for the next days wedding duty, Fluff being a poooffffffff and me being absolutely knackered after a late night and a bit to much wine the night before it seemed that we would not head out...... nope I pulled myself together and gathered up the troops and me, Penfold, Linx and Dirty Peek cruised into ob, I won a pound by betting Nathan Hart would be in the Waveney, yep there he was!!!!!! I then trapped off a bit about whooping people at pool and lost every game!! briiiillliiiiaaannnntttt!!!
Broadview then was on our radar, surely the buka bus wasn't there again!!!!!!!!???????? we tentatively poked our heads round the door, the fear was etched on our faces, we gripped each other tight as we huddled together we hoping it wasn't there............... nope it wasn't YIPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WE CRIED, I think I had tears of joy in my eyes. what to drink? no buka? oh I know we will have to have!!!!! a couple of bottles of apple sour and stroll round with raspberry vodka drinks with little berries floating around in them- its important to get older with grace think we may have them again next week!!!!!!!!!!

Joke corner

A woman in the bar says that she wants to have plastic surgery to enlarge her breasts. Her husband tells her, "Hey, you don't need surgery to do that. I know how to do it without surgery."The lady asks, "How do I do it without surgery?""Just rub toilet paper between them."Startled the lady asks, "How does that make them bigger?""I don't know, but it worked for your ass."

an exciting new feature!!!!

Gotts Watch

Have you seen this man?? if you do please do not hesitate to text me with the exact date and where abouts!!!! we need to keep an eye out to put his parents minds at rest!!! so if you spot him, make the effort and do what is right!!!

The last reported sighting was 1855 on Saturday the 18th of the month 2010 a black bmw was reported to be seen leaving the kfc car park with a rather large carrier bag of food! could this have been the elusive DG!?

Weekend Sportsman over and out!

B-TEAM WRITE UP

Hello again Potty fans

Following last weeks victory a vicious rumour (started by Ozzie) has been circulated (by Ozzie), that we can only win when Ozzie is playing!

An away trip to the Hearts of Oak (without Ozzie again) was, therefore a good opportunity for the guys to prove that this rumour is completely unfounded.

As well as Ozzie, we were also without Hos and Yid and this years part-timers Das Hos and Shillo, meaning that Wally was going to have to step in for two games and he was thrown straight in at the deep end, on first in the doubles. Playing with Clint, they put together a good game and were 300 ahead on their way to securing the win. 1-0. Bungle and myself were next with a good close game that Billy enjoyed so much he forgot he was having trouble letting go of the darts! Nice and smooth and well on his way back! Straight in and straight out – 2-0. Glynn and Trev next, question – who hits double 19? Answer – Glynn does. 3-0. a good battle from Moysie and Shoot em up and a rare 4-0 up after the doubles. Three good solid games from me, Billy and Moysie and were 7-0 up with the points secured.

Wally was next on and unlucky to come up against their best player in the form of steve bidle (although he did try to avoid this by stepping up to the oche for the game before in the hope that no-one would notice) and we lost our first leg of the night.

A good 66 finish from Goochy and a solid game from Glynn and we were 9-1 ahead. With Wally becoming concerned that he might soon hear a loud out of tune rendition of a certain one hit wonder hit from the eighties, Shoot em up went on and spared him this fate by not being able to finish. 9-2 and no Chesney! Clint (who is fast turning into the midnight cowboy based on the time of the day he plays his best darts) was on last (again, fortunately) and although he struggled to finish, managed to hold on for a convincing 10-2 win.

So the rumour mill can stop, we can win without Ozzie. This week we’ll find out if we can win without me as well as I am missing on family duties so good luck to the boys at home to the Kevill.

I’ll see you all soon

All the best

Atko

THE CHALLENGE

Last Friday night saw the first in what the spectators hope to be a thrilling challenge match series. The Challenge was First person to completely devour 3 buttered bread rolls was the CHAMP (perfectly normal friday activity). Billyhill did a book on the event which saw both competitors hard to split. Once the event took place there was only one winner. The old Hare and the Tortoise scenario. Matt tried to swallow the first roll whole and never recovered. Gary's more composed method saw him to victory. Gary 'The Mouth' Flatt beat Hooky comprehensively (Seeings as Linx pointed out that Gary finished first and Matt had dropped half a roll on the floor!!!)

So Flatty is the undisputed champion of the WORLD!!!! Who will try and defeat him this week