B-TEAM WRITE UP

Two weeks to catch up on since I forgot last week. We’ve been dropping points recently and third spot is now very tight but still achievable but we need to raise our game.

Away to the Hearts we knew it would be difficult but got off to a terrific start going 3-1 up after the doubles. They had been disappointed with their form of late, not being able to finish legs but you know it can’t last and, guess what, they found their form against us. The first singles was incredible with Paul Philips hitting a 180 against Goochy, only for Trev to get one back and get a shot at a double. Unfortunately he couldn’t hit it and lost the leg and this set the tone. One by one we went down with chances to finish few and far between as they played consistently well. After the three doubles, we only managed one win in the singles thanks to Moysie, and went down 8-4.

This week we entertained the Marquis A, another tough game. Hos and myself were on first and, after a slow start, we were chasing all the way. A sniff of a chance and an excellent 140 from Hos when on 152 helped us to nick it. Moysie and Oz then Clint and Shoot em up both went down before Bungle and the Legend (or Dick Turpin and Ned Kelly) got one back without anyone quite knowing how! Clint was up first but lost and had several words to describe how he played but unfortunately none of them are suitable for publication. Hos went next and the same adjectives probably applied but he managed to win to keep us in it at 3-3. Next up was Goochy (the 180 magnet). He had one hit against him again for the second week running and we were behind again. Ozzie went next with a strange game which included trying to score on double top (with some success), complete brain-fade when trying to work out a finish and a win at the end of it. At this stage we were at 4-4 and there was only one person in the room who didn’t think we should be 8-0 down but he didn’t count because his guide dog disagreed with him! Bungle was next to lose before a good game from Shoot em up, who was the first on our side to be first down to a double, got us back to 5-5. Moysie on 7th went down to leave me on last for the draw. Playing against Flash (again!), it wasn’t a great game but fortunately he played worse than I did so we managed to get the draw. Not a great performance and another bit of a mugging but at least we got a point this week. Third place is now out of our control but a strong finish over the last few games could still give us an outside chance. Next up is a trip to KWMC so see you next week.

All the best Quiff

Ex- Servicemans D V PotBlack A

Ex Sevicemens 'D' vs. Pot Black 'A'

Well all I can say is thank god the blog was covered in my absence by the always very useless 'Weekend Sportsman'. In his defence I think he covered proceedings quite well especially last week as he made decent notes!!!

To clarify the note about 'Smashers' first pint! This was the first drink he had ever taken from winning a leg of darts!

With some good results of late and with the match the following week against Ex Sevicemens 'HG' it was a game to make our mark in, and we certainly did that. High scores galore (for us anyway) and decent performances from all our players which was reflected in the final score line of 12 - 0.

'Weekend' was out classed in the double starting this week as I had returned!!! 148 and 88 in the doubles and singles respectively shows the No.1 status clearly is me!

Next weeks game was the main talking point all night especially with people potentially AWOL!

Craig the 'Skip' is on a course and will be back a little late! - At least he's drinking this week!
Matt 'One size fits all' could be missing with a job miles away!
Alan 'Dunston' quit the team earlier in the season!
Spence 'Sheepy' is missing for the match!
'Bardy' needs to rearrange a shift at work!

Lets just hope come Friday we have at least 8 (excluding you two 'Fluffy' and 'Freecabs')!

Other news

1/ No Stacey behind the bar so no 'Chillo' - I'm sure they're totally unconnected!
2/ Liar dice was not won by me for a change (who cares then!) but I made to first time calls of liar on 'Liquids' to knock off a couple of his lives.
3/ Freecabs running smoothly and timely this week as there was no need to travel across the other side of town for 'Weekend'
4/ 'Weekend' still officially know to his closest friends as T _ A T !
5/ All participants at the 'Snake-bite Saturday' event at the Pot Black have lived to tell the tale! According to T _ A T "the night isn't over until I've had a Jacques" !

Joke Corner

A stewardess was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, and he opened his coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."

A lady was picking through the frozen chickens at the supermarket, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked the shelf stacker, "Do these chickens get any bigger?" He replied, "No, they're dead."

Vice Skip
Capt Cob
Linx

Pot Black B V Marquis A

Hi Guys Two weeks to catch up on since I forgot last week. We’ve been dropping points recently and third spot is now very tight but still achievable but we need to raise our game. Away to the Hearts we knew it would be difficult but got off to a terrific start going 3-1 up after the doubles. They had been disappointed with their form of late, not being able to finish legs but you know it can’t last and, guess what, they found their form against us. The first singles was incredible with Paul Philips hitting a 180 against Goochy, only for Trev to get one back and get a shot at a double. Unfortunately he couldn’t hit it and lost the leg and this set the tone. One by one we went down with chances to finish few and far between as they played consistently well. After the three doubles, we only managed on win in the singles thanks to Moysie, and went down 8-4. This week we entertained the Marquis A, another tough game. Hos and myself were on first and, after a slow start, we were chasing all the way. A sniff of a chance and an excellent 140 from Hos when on 152 helped us to nick it. Moysie and Oz then Clint and Shoot em up both went down before Bungle and the Legend (or Dick Turpin and Ned Kelly) got one back without anyone quite knowing how! Clint was up first but lost and had several words to describe how he played but unfortunately none of them are suitable for publication. Hos went next and the same adjectives probably applied but he managed to win to keep us in it at 3-3. Next up was Goochy (the 180 magnet). He had one hit against him again for the second week running and we were behind again. Ozzie went next with a strange game which included trying to score on double top (with some success), complete brain-fade when trying to work out a finish and a win at the end of it. At this stage we were at 4-4 and there was only one person in the room who didn’t think we should be 8-0 down but he didn’t count because his guide dog disagreed with him! Bungle was next to lose before a good game from Shoot em up, who was the first on our side to be first down to a double, got us back to 5-5. Moysie on 7th went down to leave me on last for the draw. Playing against Flash (again!), it wasn’t a great game but fortunately he played worse than I did so we managed to get the draw. Not a great performance and another bit of a mugging but at least we got a point this week. Third place is now out of our control but a strong finish over the last few games could still give us an outside chance. Next up is a trip to KWMC so see you next week. All the best Quiff

POT BLACK A Vs MARQUIS B

(stella Gaz)

Hello all !! weekend sportsman is here for a second week in a row, captain cob coughed midweek so had to call off, he phoned the doctor and gave him the symptoms he replied 'I know what you have sir, its not life threatening but it can kill' 'what it is doctor' replied a worried cob on? 'fat-itus' said the doctor!!! I very much doubt he will be cured this week but he may make the effort and come out any way.
Right onto the game and this week I have written notes!!!(oooooooohhhhh!!!!) but cant read em so here goes with the darts facts!!! we won 10-2, craigo decided to lose both his games this week and was accompanied by spence in the doubles. Lets move onto more pressing matters, ill title this section
SOME PEOPLE HAVE NO IDEA!!!!!!!!
Its started before the game when an open board was DEMANDED by one of their players despite the fact it was an open board already!, I took it well obviously and replied in a whisper ALL YA GOTTA DO IS JOIN THE FUC**N QUEUE!!!!then during the doubles we had the re emergence of Stella Gaz(fluffy) because Matt was about to throw for his double when some do nut( I think he was your mate wasn't he sheepy?) decided next time was the appropriate call??? once again it went down well, one size Hook popped out and turned round and politely( liberal use of polite) explained that you should not say next time when someone is on a double, then Stella Gaz had a god old barney about it too!! the **** in question was feeling pressured by the abuse and was seeking sanctuary by asking his old Monday mixed mate Gotts free cabs to and I quote 'sort him out will ya Darren!' that went well free cabs replies' why I agree with him!' ahh well its been a while since that old chestnut popped up think the quiff may have been involved last time (am I right Stella Gaz?). just to finish this matter, yes they did complain to the league , and no we don't give a flying ****!!!!!!
Other matters
I'm still the best double starter in the league! liar dice honors were split with a win each for myself and fluffy( I think!), Stacey wasn't working-Chillo wasn't there (no connection just thought id mention it!!) and I have some note on my paper about smasher and his 1st drink (anyone got any ideas?? I haven't!)
Last and most importantly(skips stag crew will appreciate this!!) this Saturday the mighty blues grace our TV screens and we have decided to visit the local pot black club early for a few( once again LIBERAL use) beers!! we have entitled this day SNAKE BITE SATURDAY!!! any one is welcome and the only condition is you drink snakebite until it comes out of your ears then you move onto chasers!!!! ( guess who is my Sunday golfing doubles partner??.... free cabs (he he he!!!!))
laters boys maybe ill see you Saturday
weekend sportsman
(i've cut own my alcohol intake dramatically I only drink once a week now ( Thursday to Sunday) that's right I'm dedicated)

Pot Black B V Ex-servicemans

Hi Guys A very important game this week at home to the ex servs a. we knew a win would strengthen our position in third and give us a good chance of holding on to it but unfortunately we didn’t turn up. A poor start in the doubles saw us 3-0 down due to a combination of poor starting and poor finishing, with some poor scoring thrown in for good measure. Our western pairing of shoot em up an clint got one back for us with a good steady game. After oz lost the first singles, Hos held on well against adam flaxman, with adam playing fairly well despite struggling with dartitis (I think he is trying for the title of slowest throw in the league but is still well behind the leaders from our a team, flatty and hooky). Moysie then struggled and lost before our in-form player of the moment, Paul Tyler got us another leg. After this it was downhill all the way with Stridey, me, Bungle and Wally all losing to leave us at 9-3. An idea of how poor the whole game was, we hardly started any games with the first three darts. Even they were fed up with how they were playing and I don’t think a drink was bought all night with all players declining in a spirit of dejected embarrassment. I had decided not to cut my hair while we were still playing well and the quiff was rapidly re-appearing, may be time for a change. Still lets not get dejected, we are still in third and our destiny is in our own hands. We’d have taken that like a shot at the beginning of the season. Another week next week so lets get back on track. Now, where’s those scissors. See you soon Quiffless

Pot Black V KCSCC

POT BLACK A Vs KCSSC ( or working mans club if you ask sheepy)
oh yes its me!!! weekend is back on the blog! wots been going on since my last visit too the blog you ask? well I experimented with new darts that didn't work! I've qualified for the unluckiest snooker frame loss in the leagues history (DO NOT START ME ON THAT ONE U'LL BE HERE FOR HOURS!) tried my hand at the pot black quiz with the best partner ever (came last but had fun!) .........oh s**t stop there I go talking bout myself, Fluffy is rubbing off on me!!!!!!!!!!
What a good week to be here an 11-1 win, oh yes that's correct A CHESNEY!!!!! I'm not going to name names all I can say is his surname was Harrod..................................and by some strange miracle it wasn't me!!!!!! he managed to escape the song so I thought i'd treat him YOU ARE THE ONE AND ONLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but still good for the legs difference just in case! well played boys.
As usual my memory is slightly sketchy especially as the daytime golf championships was cancelled due to adverse weather so me and fluffy combined to make the least effective team ever but still defeated hurricane and free cabs in the afternoons darts and snooker, while treating ourselves to some light refreshments of the lager variety!
Thing's I know( could be made up or just incorrect)
1) Lincoln stats a doubles game for the 1st time in months but im still the best in the world
2) Kelvin is feeling confident in the afternoon practice against Peter Wright at 7-6!!'he is playing out of his skin, I turn up ooops a 23-6 loss
3) Craig smasher George returns to his Friday form
4) Cob on should learn to leave my food alone!!!
5) Fluffy wasn't there! far better night without him and the dice box stayed in tact
6) Will I ever win at liar dice again? and seriously what are the rules on the hands???????
7) Chillo turns up at pot black and a certain barmaid is working ( a trend developing ???)
8) Finding out in Broadview that my farts attract women.....don't worry im shaking my head too!!!!
Not long now boys till the big dual against the mighty home guard!!!!!!! lets prepare correctly and drink heavily mid week to build up our accuracy!! if any ones free give me a call and ill let you know what pub im in that night !!!!
Paul 'weekend sportsman' Harrod
(doctors sent me a letter the other day asking me if I want a health check!! shall I go could be a laugh to see how many months I have left)

A-TEAM WRITE UP

HOOKY 9-DARTER IN SHED! (AND I MADE A 147 IN THE GARAGE LAST WEEK AS WELL....)

Well after a disappointing week against our sister team it was time to get the winning ways back again!

Nice to see that 'Skip' had got rid of his slim darts and resorted back to his legendary old style darts. Nice to see that his brother, 'HUD', had also resorted back to his old darts (like that makes any difference? $hit is $hit where I come from). Liquids and Serious were persisting with their new darts the Taylor Phase 4.17826389 and Adrian Lewis 'Jackpots' respectively.

In case you are all unaware, the Taylor darts came from Peter Wright, which came from the 'Power' himself.

And just in case you never heard this. . . . . Serious has hit a nine darter in his dad's shed with the 'Jackpot' darts. Most people heard this from Matt when they wished him a happy new year and they had in reply 'I hit a nine darter'!!!

Darts Highlights

1/ Me and Hud struggled to finish in our doubles with 9 darts missed!
2/ Smasher Chins lost again
3/ Liquids lost (I think) again! I'm sure he lost as Gottsfreecabs explained what a foul mood he was in because he'd mislaid his dart holder cover!
4/ Can't remember the other loser?. . . . . BARDY? That would mean HUD won a game? (hard to believe)

Result 8 - 4

Other matters

1/ Mrs Fluff finishes night out at 21:00 which gives Mr Fluff enough time to pop out for a diet coke and Liar dice!
2/ I win the first game of liar dice for a third successive week!
3/ 'Cob on' decides that flames is far more tempting than Broadview.
4/ 3 quarters of an hour later and 'cob on' reunites with his pals to take advantage of Gottsfreecabs! (How much did you bloody order)?
5/ Stubborn HUD refuses to get out of the free taxi whilst parked outside of his house. 'Cob on' attempts to remove HUD from the back seat by tempting out of the car when steeling his pizza! The threat of throwing his pizza in the hedge gets verbal abuse from the stubborn git! A demonstration to scare him out of the car results in an accidental free firing of sliced pizza into the school hedge!!!
6/ HUD should have learnt his lesson by now? Do not eat in Gotty's car on the way home!!!

Tournaments

Singles
Linx and Liquids

Doubles
Linx/Serious and Skip/Snatch-u-ral

Trebles
Linx/Serious/Skip and Sheepy/..?../..?..


Joke corner

Their was a camel and an elephant. The elephant said to the camel "How come you have your tits on your back?" and the camel got offended so he told the elephant "Well why do you have your dick on your face?"

Two eggs boiling in a pan. One says to the other, "I've got a huge crack." The other replies, "Stop teasing me, I'm not f*cking hard yet."


Vice Skip
Capt Cob
Linx

B-TEAM WRITE UP

SHOOT EM UP TRIPLE SALKO'S ARE WAY TO A DRAW
(Even managed to flip away too soon on the photo!!!)

An away trip this week to the football club and a potential banana skin as its not an easy venue. For the first doubles we had Moysie and Oz together again following last weeks win (which I inadvertently credited to Bungle and Goochy, sorry boys). It took a long while to start until steve eventually got in with a 116 but the head start proved decisive and we were 1 down. With Goochy falling victim of my Benitezesque squad rotation system, Bungle was on next partnered with Shoot em up. This proved a good pairing and they got us back to level. Next up were Hos and me and we were blitzed down the board by some consistent high scoring but they struggled to finish and let us catch up. Unfortunately it got worse and none of us could hit a double and after several goes at double one they eventually hit it to take them back ahead and leave us feeling gutted. Clint Tyler and Yid were up last but couldn’t pull it back and we found ourselves 3-1 down for the second week running.





Hos was first in the singles and a commanding game including a 180 pulled it back to 3-2 before Bungle played another good game and showboated with a d6 d4 finish to get us level. Goochy then fell victim to an excellent 14 darter from Neil Cook and we were 4-3 down. I was up next but struggled to start but kept with it and managed to take advantage of poor finishing to nick it before Moysie won a really close game with an 83 finish on the bull. We were in front for the first time but it didn’t last long as first Ozzie who was always trailing and then Clint who couldn’t start both lost to leave us 6-5 down. Shoot em up was on last in a real pressure game and held his nerve to close out the leg and earn us a very hard fought draw. Signing the card showed how hard it was as I had to initial 14 high score on their side in the singles alone! A real battle that felt like a point gained rather than a point lost and our spirit keeps going. A couple of big battles to come with the Ex Servs A next but we are still in third at present and keen to stay there. Well done boys.





See you soon Quiff